Greetings Ringing Cedars kin!
I'm going to open up a can of worms here. Or, at least at first sight it may look like worms, but I assure you that for those who can ponder and honestly and openly tackle such a topic...well, your Spirit would reign supreme over the flesh once again, as it was meant to be.
Anastasia says that when a man is intimate with a woman (and I'm not sure this applies to the male masturbation) and feels 'satisfaction' that a spirit is created and suffers monumentally because it cannot embody if the intention was for the end result to be orgasm rather than co-creation. I cried when I read this. I was partly responsible for God only knows how many suffering spirits. And where were they now? What chaos did they cause throughout the years in my personal life, if at all? How do I go cold turkey? Or do I even have to? Was there nothing in between co-creating baby #1 and baby #2, etc.? That didn't feel true to me either. I no longer wanted to violate any spiritually based natural laws as 'written' by the Father (this is what I call God/Creator). So what did I do? For a time I went cold turkey, which, as you can imagine, didn't sit well with my then husband. But occasionally would succumb to this desire I had known for almost all of my life, especially during my ovulating cycle. And after I had my 'fix' I now knew I had created a spirit that was suffering and felt all the worse for it. And during my on again, off again, moments of celibacy my mind began to ponder thoughts of a different nature. I began to realize/understand how women continuously put their sexuality in second place, at best, when she knowingly and feelingly is aware that something just isn't right about this, especially after one bears children. Still, she usually succumbs to the advances of her man as if what she knowingly feels is a figment of her imagination, a musing of a woman that must have something wrong with her if she doesn't find orgasm as pleasurable as her mate. So what are we to do? Look all around you and very very few are happy with their bedroom encounters. Little girls, as young as 11, are having sex. Porn is everywhere to be seen...in the mall disguised as sexy lingerie, on TV during daylight hours disguised as soap operas, etc. Ladies, ever wonder why it is advertised everywhere that we must work so hard to bed a man?
Again, I ask you, what are we to do? I will bet money that Anastasia explained to Megre what couples are to do between baby #1 and #2, but the thought of putting the idea out there which promotes non-seminal, non-orgasmic lovemaking, well, that's absurd! Or is it? If this is true Megre's books would not be the least popular with the men and the women would start getting all kinds of crazy ideas, like, well, denying their men and sales would probably drop. And we can't have women denying their men...or can we?
I then received an answer to my contemplations regarding this specific topic via the Space of Love magazine which I receive in the mail every few months. Regina Jensen, Ph.D (Father bless her soul) wrote an article titled How Lao Tzu Had Sex
. For those who don't know who he was, he lived more than 2,000 years ago (some say he was a mythological figure) and was a Taoist sage. The article speaks of and I quote, "non-seminal, non-orgasmic intercourse as the most wholesome, loving and bonding form of marital relations."
Some of you may have heard of Tantric sex, but this has been distorted as well because between baby #1 and #2 there is intimacy, a high level, very spiritual form of it, but with the orgasm still being an aspect of it. Lao Tzu says, "A person's approach to sexuality is a sign of his level of evolution. Unevolved persons practice ordinary sexual intercourse. Placing all emphasis upon the sexual organs, they neglect the body's other organs and systems. Whatever physical energy is accumulated is summarily discharged, and the subtle energies are similarly dissipated and disordered."
Wow! Could this dissipation and disorder of these subtle energies be the grim reaper that stands over the beds of these 'unevolved persons'? It would seem so to me considering the chaos and conflict that couples experience in this sexual circus.
Marnia Robinson who researched Lao Tzu and this topic at great length says, "Where ordinary intercourse is effortful, angelic cultivation is calm, relaxed, quiet, and natural. Where ordinary intercourse unites sex organs with sex organs, angelic cultivation unites spirit with spirit, mind with mind, and every cell of one body with every cell of the other body...Culminating not in dissolution but in integration, it is an opportunity for a man and woman to mutually transform and uplift each other into the realm of bliss and wholeness."
So I thought to myself, does this mean that he'll lay in bed with me and actually hold me for a while and won't just roll over and fall asleep as if nothing just happened and as if my giving myself to him in love, spirit, and yes, flesh, was like serving a steak dinner? If having non-seminal and non-orgasmic sex means he will hold me because there is no end to the intimacy, cool, then I'm there! How do I start? What do I have to do? What do WE have to do? The WE is the tricky part, isn't it ladies? HE may not be interested in this WE, in this new antic of yours, this crazy God-forsaken endeavor. And when one can't fit the square peg into the round hole and the square peg refuses to go 'round' then we either go looking for that round one, go it alone, or ignore our beautiful Spirit, replaying the same scene knowing full well the end result. Tough choice to make.
But I tell you, being true to one's Spirit is the only way to go for me as it never lies to me and makes me stronger with my feelings refining themselves to such an extent that I actually begin to trust them. And to the women I say, trust your feelings for they have a great relationship with your Spirit who in turn has a great relationship with the Father. And to the men I say, trust your woman's feelings even if they seem chaotic or conflicting it is only because she is not allowing her Spirit to reign supreme over her flesh. Support her and allow her into her spiritual sexuality. Follow her. She may not know exactly where she is taking the both of you but her feelings will direct her to that sensual bliss you have both been longing for.
I'll get off my soap box now and for those who feel inspired to then check out www.reuniting.info
or click on this link:
and read this online 32 page book that explains the Karezza method (means caress in Italian). The touch is IMMENSELY important and for reasons I do not understand men have fallen victim a great deal more than women with respect to the flesh being sovereign over the Spirit. Yet the flesh is important, it plays a vital role and is not to be demeaned but somehow it was hijacked by lust and now needs to be returned to its proper place, so to speak, and it must learn that first and foremost it must be subservient to the Spirit and follow its directives. Flesh should not be king and must be dethroned. Women have a deeper understanding of this I suppose simply because we are not inseminators, but that should not put the men at a disadvantage.
May your lovemaking truly be that...LOVE, may the Spirit of he and she unite as one, before, during, and after this co-creation of pleasure, and may the harmony and balance of such intimacy return to its pristine origins and prevail along with the Good.
Blessings of love...making,
P.S. It was not my intention to insult anyone so I apologize in advance if I have done so.
P.P.S. Please people share your experiences and feelings which may help others. And Kali, could we start another group perhaps titled as I wrote in the subject line - Sex and Co-creation. I have a feeling there would be many members in this group. :-)